Nama: citra novia rini
NPM: 12 23 064
Haircut
Ring Lardner
I got another barber
that comes over from Carterville and helps me out Saturdays, but the rest of
the time I can get along all right alone. You can see for yourself that this
ain't no New York: City and besides that, the most of the boys works all day
and don't have no leisure to drop in here and get themselves prettied up.
You're a newcomer, ain't
you? I thought I hadn't seen you round before. I hope you like it good enough
to stay. As I say, we ain't no New York City or Chicago, but we have pretty
good times. Not as good, though, since Jim Kendall got killed. When he was
alive, him and Hod Meyers used to keep this town in an uproar. I bet they was
more laughin' done here than any town its size in America.
Jim was comical, and Hod
was pretty near a match for him. Since Jim's gone, Hod tries to hold his end up
just the same as ever, but it's tough goin' when you ain't got nobody to kind
of work with.
They used to be plenty
fun in here Saturdays. This place is jampacked Saturdays, from four o'clock on.
Jim and Hod would show up right after their supper round six o'clock. Jim would
set himself down in that big chair, nearest the blue spittoon. Whoever had been
settin' in that chair, why they'd get up when Jim come in and at" it to him.
You'd of thought it was
a reserved seat like they have sometimes in a theaytre. Hod would generally
always stand or walk up and down or some Saturdays, of course, he'd be settin'
in this chair part of the time, gettin' a haircut.
Well, Jim would set
there a w'ile without opening his mouth only to spit, and then finally he'd say
to me, "Whitey,"--my right name, that is, my right first name, is
Dick, but everybody round here calls me Whitey--Jim would say, "Whitey,
your nose looks like a rosebud tonight. You must of been drinkin' some of your
aw de cologne."
So I'd say, "No,
Jim, but you look like you'd been drinkin' something of that kind or somethin'
worse."
Jim would have to laugh
at that, but then he'd speak up and say, "No, I ain't had nothin' to
drink, but that ain't sayin' I wouldn't like somethin'. I wouldn't even mind if
it was wood alcohol."
Then Hod Meyers would
say, "Neither would your wife." That would set everybody to laughin'
because Jim and his wife wasn't on very good terms. She'd of divorced him only
they wasn't no chance to get alimony and she didn't have no way to take care of
herself and the kids. She couldn't never understand Jim. He was kind of rough,
but a good fella at heart.
Him and Hod had all
kinds of sport with Milt Sheppard. I don't suppose you've seen Milt. Well, he's
got an Adam's apple that looks more like a mush-melon. So I'd be shavin' Milt
and when I'd start to shave down here on his neck, Hod would holler, "Hey,
Whitey, wait a minute! Before you cut into it, let's make up a pool and see who
can guess closest to the number of seeds."
And Jim would say,
"If Milt hadn't of been so hoggish, he'd of ordered a half a cantaloupe
instead of a whole one and it might not of stuck in his throat."
All the boys would roar
at this and Milt himself would force a smile, though the joke was on him. Jim
certainly was a card!
There's his shavin' mug,
setting on the shelf, right next to Charley Vail's. "Charles M.
Vail." That's the druggist. He comes in regular for his shave, three times
a week. And Jim's is the cup next to Charley's. "dames H. Kendall."
Jim won't need no shavin' mug no more, but I'll leave it there just the same
for old time's sake. Jim certainly was a character!
Years ago, Jim used to
travel for a canned goods concern over in Carterville. They sold canned goods.
Jim had the whole northern half of the State and was on the road five days out
of every week. He'd drop in here Saturdays and tell his experiences for that
week. It was rich.
I guess he paid more
attention to playin' jokes than makin' sales. Finally the concern let him out
and he come right home here and told everybody he'd been fired instead of
sayin' he'd resigned like most fellas would of.
It was a Saturday and
the shop was full and Jim got up out of that chair and says, "Gentlemen, I
got an important announcement to make. I been fired from my job."
Well, they asked him if
he was in earnest and he said he was and nobody could think of nothin' to say
till Jim finally broke the ice himself. He says, "I been sellin' canned
goods and now I'm canned goods myself.
You see, the concern
he'd been workin' for was a factory that made canned goods. Over in
Carterville. And now Jim said he was canned himself. He was certainly a card!
Jim had a great trick
that he used to play w'ile he was travelin'. For instance, he'd be ridin' on a
train and they'd come to some little town like, well, like, well, like, we'll
say, like Benton. Jim would look out the train window and read the signs of the
stores.
For instance, they'd be
a sign, "Henry Smith, Dry Goods." Well, Jim would write down the name
and the name of the town and when he got to wherever he was goin' he'd mail
back a postal card to Henry Smith at Benton and not sign no name to it, but
he'd write on the card, well somethin' like "Ask your wife about that book
agent that spent the afternoon last week," or "Ask your Missus who
kept her from gettin' lonesome the last time you was in Carterville." And
he'd sign the card, "A Friend."
Of course, he never knew
what really come of none of these jokes, but he could picture what probably
happened and that was enough.
Jim didn't work very
steady after he lost his position with the Carterville people. What he did
earn, coin' odd jobs round town why he spent pretty near all of it on gin, and
his family might of starved if the stores hadn't of carried them along. Jim's
wife tried her hand at dressmakin', but they ain't nobody goin' to get rich
makin' dresses in this town.
As I say, she'd of
divorced Jim, only she seen that she couldn't support herself and the kids and
she was always hopin' that some day Jim would cut out his habits and give her
more than two or three dollars a week.
They was a time when she
would go to whoever he was workin' for and ask them to give her his wages, but
after she done this once or twice, he beat her to it by borrowin' most of his
pay in advance. He told it all round town, how he had outfoxed his Missus. He
certainly was a caution!
But he wasn't satisfied
with just outwittin' her. He was sore the way she had acted, tryin' to grab off
his pay. And he made up his mind he'd get even. Well, he waited till Evans's
Circus was advertised to come to town. Then he told his wife and two kiddies
that he was goin' to take them to the circus. The day of the circus, he told
them he would get the tickets and meet them outside the entrance to the tent.
Well, he didn't have no
intentions of bein' there or buyin' tickets or nothin'. He got full of gin and
laid round Wright's poolroom all day. His wife and the kids waited and waited
and of course he didn't show up. His wife didn't have a dime with her, or
nowhere else, I guess. So she finally had to tell the kids it was all off and
they cried like they wasn't never goin' to stop.
Well, it seems, w'ile
they was cryin', Doc Stair come along and he asked what was the matter, but
Mrs. Kendall was stubborn and wouldn't tell him, but the kids told him and he
insisted on takin' them and their mother in the show. Jim found this out
afterwards and it was one reason why he had it in for Doc Stair.
Doc Stair come here
about a year and a half ago. He's a mighty handsome young fella and his clothes
always look like he has them made to order. He goes to Detroit two or three
times a year and w'ile he's there must have a tailor take his measure and then
make him a suit to order. They cost pretty near twice as much, but they fit a
whole lot better than if you just bought them in a store.
For a w'ile everybody
was wonderin' why a young doctor like Doc Stair should come to a town like this
where we already got old Doc Gamble and Doc Foote that's both been here for
years and all the practice in town was always divided between the two of them.
Then they was a story
got round that Doc Stair's gal had thronged him over, a gal up in the Northern
Peninsula somewhere, and the reason he come here was to hide himself away and
forget it. He said himself that he thought they wasn't nothin' like general
practice in a place like ours to fit a man to be a good all round doctor. And
that's why he'd came.
Anyways, it wasn't long
before he was makin' enough to live on, though they tell me that he never
dunned nobody for what they owed him, and the folks here certainly has got the
owin' habit, even in my business. If I had all that was comin' to me for just
shaves alone, I could go to Carterville and put up at the Mercer for a week and
see a different picture every night. For instance, they's old George Purdy--but
I guess I shouldn't ought to be gossipin'.
Well, last year, our
coroner died, died of the flu. Ken Beatty, that was his name. He was the
coroner. So they had to choose another man to be coroner in his place and they
picked Doc Stair. He laughed at first and said he didn't want it, but they made
him take it. It ain't no job that anybody would fight for and what a man makes
out of it in a year would just about buy seeds for their garden. Doc's the
kind, though, that can't say no to nothin' if you keep at him long enough.
But I was goin' to tell
you about a poor boy we got here in town-Paul Dickson. He fell out of a tree
when he was about ten years old. Lit on his head and it done somethin' to him
and he ain't never been right. No harm in him, but just silly. Jim Kendall used
to call him cuckoo; that's a name Jim had for anybody that was off their head,
only he called people's head their bean. That was another of his gags, callin'
head bean and callin' crazy people cuckoo. Only poor Paul ain't crazy, but just
silly.
You can imagine that Jim
used to have all kinds of fun with Paul. He'd send him to the White Front
Garage for a left-handed monkey wrench. Of course they ain't no such thing as a
left-handed monkey wrench.
And once we had a kind
of a fair here and they was a baseball game between the fats and the leans and
before the game started Jim called Paul over and sent him way down to Schrader's
hardware store to get a key for the pitcher's box.
They wasn't nothin' in
the way of gags that Jim couldn't think up, when he put his mind to it.
Poor Paul was always
kind of suspicious of people, maybe on account of how Jim had kept foolin' him.
Paul wouldn't have much to do with anybody only his own mother and Doc Stair
and a girl here in town named Julie Gregg. That is, she ain't a girl no more,
but pretty near thirty or over.
When Doc first come to
town, Paul seemed to feel like here was a real friend and he hung round Doc's
office most of the w'ile; the only time he wasn't there was when he'd go home
to eat or sleep or when he seen Julie Gregg coin' her shoppin'.
When he looked out Doc's
window and seen her, he'd run downstairs and join her and tag along with her to
the different stores. The poor boy was crazy about Julie and she always treated
him mighty nice and made him feel like he was welcome, though of course it
wasn't nothin' but pity on her side.
Doc done all he could to
improve Paul's mind and he told me once that he really thought the boy was
getting better, that they was times when he was as bright and sensible as
anybody else.
But I was goin' to tell
you about Julie Gregg. Old man Gregg was in the lumber business, but got to
drinkin' and lost the most of his money and when he died, he didn't leave
nothin' but the house and just enough insurance for the girl to skimp along on.
Her mother was a kind of
a half invalid and didn't hardly ever leave the house. Julie wanted to sell the
place and move somewhere else after the old man died, but the mother said she
was born here and would die here. It was tough on Julie as the young people
round this town--well, she's too good for them.
She'd been away to
school and Chicago and New York and different places and they ain't no subject
she can't talk on, where you take the rest of the young folks here and you
mention anything to them outside of Gloria Swanson or Tommy Meighan and they
think you're delirious. Did you see Gloria in Wages of Virtue? You missed
somethin'!
Well, Doc Stair hadn't
been here more than a week when he came in one day to get shaved and I
recognized who he was, as he had been pointed out to me, so I told him about my
old lady. She's been ailin' for a couple years and either Doc Gamble or Doc
Foote, neither one, seemed to be helpin' her. So he said he would come out and
see her, but if she was able to get out herself, it would be better to bring
her to his office where he could make a completer examination.
So I took her to his office
and w'ile I was waitin' for her in the reception room, in come Julie Gregg.
When somebody comes in Doc Stair's office, they's a bell that rings in his
inside office so he can tell they's somebody to see him.
So he left my old lady
inside and come out to the front office and that's the first time him and Julie
met and I guess it was what they call love at first sight. But it wasn't
fifty-fifty. This young fella was the slickest lookin' fella she'd ever seen in
this town and she went wild over him. To him she was just a young lady that
wanted to see the doctor.
She'd came on about the
same business I had. Her mother had been doctorin' for years with Doc Gamble
and Doc Foote and with" out no results. So she'd heard they was a new doc
in town and decided to give him a try. He promised to call and see her mother
that same day.
I said a minute ago that
it was love at first sight on her part. I'm not only judgin' by how she acted
afterwards but how she looked at him that first day in his office. I ain't no
mind reader, but it was wrote all over her face that she was gone.
Now Jim Kendall, besides
bein' a jokesmith and a pretty good drinker, well Jim was quite a lady-killer.
I guess he run pretty wild durin' the time he was on the road for them
Carterville people, and besides that, he'd had a couple little affairs of the
heart right here in town. As I say, his wife would have divorced him, only she
couldn't.
But Jim was like the
majority of men, and women, too, I guess. He wanted what he couldn't get. He
wanted Julie Gregg and worked his head off tryin' to land her. Only he'd of
said bean instead of head.
Well, Jim's habits and
his jokes didn't appeal to Julie and of course he was a married man, so he
didn't have no more chance than, well, than a rabbit. That's an expression of
Jim's himself. When somebody didn't have no chance to get elected or somethin',
Jim would always say they didn't have no more chance than a rabbit.
He didn't make no bones
about how he felt. Right in here, more than once, in front of the whole crowd,
he said he was stuck on Julie and anybody that could get her for him was
welcome to his house and his wife and kids included. But she wouldn't have
nothin' to do with him; wouldn't even speak to him on the street. He finally
seen he wasn't gettin' nowheres with his usual line so he decided to try the
rough stuff. He went right up to her house one evenin' and when she opened the
door he forced his way in and grabbed her. But she broke loose and before he
could stop her, she run in the next room and locked the door and phoned to Joe
Barnes. Joe's the marshal. Jim could hear who she was phonin' to and he beat it
before Joe got there.
Joe was an old friend of
Julie's pa. Joe went to Jim the next day and told him what would happen if he
ever done it again.
I don't know how the
news of this little affair leaked out. Chances is that Joe Barnes told his wife
and she told somebody else's wife and they told their husband. Anyways, it did
leak out and Hod Meyers had the nerve to kid Jim about it, right here in this
shop. Jim didn't deny nothin' and kind of laughed it off and said for us all to
wait; that lots of people had tried to make a monkey out of him, but he always
got even.
Meanw'ile everybody in
town was wise to Julie's bein' wild mad over the Doc. I don't suppose she had
any idea how her face changed when him and her was together; of course she
couldn't of, or she'd of kept away from him. And she didn't know that we was
all noticin' how many times she made excuses to go up to his office or pass it
on the other side of the street and look up in his window to see if he was
there. I felt sorry for her and so did most other people.
Hod Meyers kept rubbin'
it into Jim about how the Doc had cut him out. Jim didn't pay no attention to
the kiddie' and you could see he was plannin' one of his jokes.
One trick Jim had was
the knack of changin' his voice. He could make you think he was a girl talkie'
and he could mimic any man's voice. To show you how good he was along this
line, I'll tell you the joke he played on me once.
You know, in most towns
of any size, when a man is dead and needs a shave, why the barber that shaves
him soaks him five dollars for the job; that is, he don't soak him, but whoever
ordered the shave. I just charge three dollars because personally I don't mind
much shavin' a dead person. They lay a whole lot stiller than live customers.
The only thing is that you don't feel like talkie' to them and you get kind of
lonesome.
Well, about the coldest
day we ever had here, two years ago last winter, the phone rung at the house
w'ile I was home to dinner and I answered the phone and it was a woman's voice
and she said she was Mrs. John Scott and her husband was dead and would I come
out and shave him.
Old John had always been
a good customer of mine. But they live seven miles out in the country, on the
Streeter road. Still I didn't see how I could say no.
So I said I would be
there, but would have to come in a jitney and it might cost three or four
dollars besides the price of the shave. So she, or the voice, it said that was
all right, so I got Frank Abbott to drive me out to the place and when I got
there, who should open the door but old John himself! He wasn't no more dead
than, well, than a rabbit.
It didn't take no
private detective to figure out who had played me this little joke. Nobody
could of thought it up but Jim Kendall. He certainly was a card!
I tell you this incident
just to show you how he could disguise his voice and make you believe it was
somebody else talkie'. I'd of swore it was Mrs. Scott had called me. Anyways,
some woman.
Well, Jim waited till he
had Doc Stair's voice down pat; then he went after revenge.
He called Julie up on a
night when he knew Doc was over in Carterville. She never questioned but what
it was Doc's voice. Jim said he must see her that night; he couldn't wait no
longer to tell her somethin'. She was all excited and told him to come to the
house. But he said he was expectin' an important long distance call and
wouldn't she please forget her manners for once and come to his office. He said
they couldn't nothin' hurt her and nobody would see her and he just must talk
to her a little w'ile. Well, poor Julie fell for it.
Doc always keeps a night
light in his office, so it looked to Julie like they was somebody there.
Meanw'ile Jim Kendall
had went to Wright's poolroom, where they was a whole gang amusin' themselves.
The most of them had drank plenty of gin, and they was a rough bunch even when
sober. They was always strong for Jim's jokes and when he told them to come with
him and see some fun they give up their card games and pool games and followed
along.
Doc's office is on the
second floor. Right outside his door they's a flight of stairs leadin' to the
floor above. Jim and his gang hid in the dark behind these stairs.
Well, tulle come up to
Doc's door and rung the bell and they was nothin' coin'. She rung it again and
she rung it seven or eight times. Then she tried the door and found it locked.
Then Jim made some kind of a noise and she heard it and waited a minute, and
then she says, "Is that you, Ralph?" Ralph is Doc's first name.
They was no answer and
it must of came to her all of a sudden that she'd been bunked. She pretty near
fell downstairs and the whole gang after her. They chased her all the way home,
hollerin', "Is that you, Ralph?" and "Oh, Ralphie, dear, is that
you?" Jim says he couldn't holler it himself, as he was laughin' too hard.
Poor Julie! She didn't
show up here on Main Street for a long, long time afterward.
And of course Jim and
his gang told everybody in town, everybody but Doc Stair. They was scared to
tell him, and he might of never knowed only for Paul Dickson. The poor cuckoo,
as Jim called him, he was here in the shop one night when Jim was still
gloatin' yet over what he'd done to Julie. And Paul took in as much of it as he
could understand and he run to Doc with the story.
It's a cinch Doc went up
in the air and swore he'd make Jim suffer. But it was a kind of a delicate
thing, because if it got out that he had beat Jim up, Julie was bound to hear
of it and then she'd know that Doc knew and of course knowin' that he knew
would make it worse for her than ever. He was goin' to do somethin', but it
took a lot of figurin'.
Well, it was a couple
days later when Jim was here in the shop again, and so was the cuckoo. Jim was
goin' duck-shootin' the next day and had come in lookin' for Hod Meyers to go
with him. I happened to know that Hod had went over to Carterville and wouldn't
be home till the end of the week. So Jim said he hated to go alone and he
guessed he would call it off. Then poor Paul spoke up and said if Jim would
take him he would go along. Jim thought a w'ile and then he said, well, he
guessed a half-wit was better than nothin'.
I suppose he was
plottin' to get Paul out in the boat and play some joke on him, like pushin'
him in the water. Anyways, he said Paul could go. He asked him had he ever shot
a duck and Paul said no, he'd never even had a gun in his hands. So Jim said he
could set in the boat and watch him and if he behaved himself, he might lend
him his gun for a couple of shots. They made a date to meet in the mornin' and
that's the last I seen of Jim alive.
Next mornin', I hadn't
been open more than ten minutes when Doc Stair come in. He looked kind of
nervous. He asked me had I seen Paul Dickson. I said no, but I knew where he
was, out duckshootin' with Jim Kendall. So Doc says that's what he had heard,
and he couldn't understand it because Paul had told him he wouldn't never have
no more to do with Jim as long as he lived.
He said Paul had told
him about the joke Jim had played on Julie. He said Paul had asked him what he
thought of the joke and the Doc told him that anybody that would do a thing
like that ought not to be let live. I said it had been a kind of a raw thing, but
Jim just couldn't resist no kind of a joke, no matter how raw. I said I thought
he was all right at heart, but just bubblin' over with mischief. Doc turned and
walked out.
At noon he got a phone
call from old John Scott. The lake where Jim and Paul had went shootin' is on
John's place. Paul had came runnin' up to the house a few minutes before and
said they'd been an accident. Jim had shot a few ducks and then give the gun to
Paul and told him to try his luck. Paul hadn't never handled a gun and he was nervous.
He was shakin' so hard that he couldn't control the gun. He let fire and Jim
sunk back in the boat, dead.
Doc Stair, bein' the
coroner, jumped in Frank Abbott's flivver and rushed out to Scott's farm. Paul
and old John was down on the shore of the lake. Paul had rowed the boat to
shore, but they'd left the body in it, waiting for Doc to come.
Doc examined the body
and said they might as well fetch it back to town. They was no use leavin' it
there or callin' a jury, as it was a plain case of accidental shootin'.
Personally I wouldn't
never leave a person shoot a gun in the same boat I was in unless I was sure
they knew somethin' about guns. Jim was a sucker to leave a new beginner have
his gun, let alone a half-wit. It probably served Jim right, what he got. But
still we miss him round here. He certainly was a card! Comb it wet or dry?
The Monkey's Paw
W. W. Jacobs
Without, the night was cold and wet, but in the small parlor of
Lakesnam Villa the blinds were drawn and the fire burned brightly. Father and
son were at chess, the former, who possessed ideas about the game involving
radical changes, putting his king into suchm sharp and unnecessary perils that
it even provoked comment from the whitehaired old lady knitting placidly by the
fire.
"Hark at the wind," said Mr. White, who, having seen a
fatal mistake after it was too late, was amiably desirous of preventing his son
from seeing it.
"I'm listening," said the latter, grimly surveying the
board as he stretched out his hand. "Check."
"I should hardly think that he'd come tonight," said his
father, with his hand poised over the board.
"Mate," replied the son.
"That's the worst of living so far out," bawled Mr.
White, with sudden and unlooked-for violence; "of all the beastly, slushy,
out-of-the-way places to live in, this is the worst. Pathway's a bog, and the
road's a torrent. I don't know what people are thinking about. I suppose
because only two houses on the road are let, they think it doesn't
matter."
"Never mind, dear," said his wife soothingly;
"perhaps you'll win the next one."
Mr. White looked up sharply, just in time to intercept a knowing
glance between mother and son. The words died away on his lips, and he hid a
guilty grin in his thin grey beard.
"There he is," said Herbert White, as the gate banged to
loudly and heavy footsteps came toward the door.
The old man rose with hospitable haste, and opening the door, was
heard condoling with the new arrival. The new arrival also condoled with
himself, so that Mrs. White said, "Tut, tut!" and coughed gently as
her husband entered the room, followed by a tall, burly man, beady of eye and
rubicund of visage.
"Sergeant Major Morris," he said, introducing him.
The sergeant major shook hands, and taking the proffered seat by
the fire, watched contentedly while his host got out whisky and tumblers and
stood a small copper kettle on the fire.
At the third glass his eyes got brighter, and he began to talk,
the little family circle regarding with eager interest this visitor from distant
parts, as he squared his broad shoulders in the chair and spoke of strange
scenes and doughty deeds, of wars and plagues and strange peoples.
"Twenty-one years of it," said Mr. White, nodding at his
wife and son. "When he went away he was a slip of a youth in the
warehouse. Now look at him."
"He don't look to have taken much harm," said Mrs. White
politely. "I'd like to go to India myself," said the old man,
"just to look round a bit, you know."
"Better where you are," said the sergeant major, shaking
his head. He put down the empty glass, and sighing softly, shook it again.
"I should like to see those old temples and fakirs and
jugglers," said the old man. "What was that you started telling me
the other day about a monkey's paw or something, Morris?"
"Nothing," said the soldier hastily. "Leastways,
nothing worth hearing."
"Monkey's paw?" said Mrs. White curiously.
"Well, it's just a bit of what you might call magic,
perhaps," said the sergeant major offhandedly.
His three listeners leaned forward eagerly. The visitor
absentmindedly put his empty glass to his lips and then set it down again. His
host filled it for him.
"To look at," said the sergeant major, fumbling in his
pocket, "it's just an ordinary little paw, dried to a mummy."
He took something out of his pocket and proffered it. Mrs. White
drew back with a grimace, but her son, taking it, examined it curiously.
"And what is there special about it?" inquired Mr.
White, as he took it from his son, and having examined it, placed it upon the
table.
"It had a spell put on it by an old fakir," said the
sergeant major, "a very holy man. He wanted to show that fate ruled
people's lives, and that those who interfered with it did so to their sorrow.
He put a spell on it so that three separate men could each have three wishes
from it."
His manner was so impressive that his hearers were conscious that
their light laughter jarred somewhat.
"Well, why don't you have three, sir?" said Herbert
White cleverly.
The soldier regarded him in the way that middle age is wont to
regard presumptuous youth. "I have," he said quietly, and his blotchy
face whitened.
"And did you really have the three wishes granted?"
asked Mrs. White.
"I did," said the sergeant major, and his glass tapped
against his strong teeth.
"And has anybody else wished?" inquired the old lady.
"The first man had his three wishes, yes," was the
reply. "I don't know what the first two were, but the third was for death.
That's how I got the paw."
His tones were so grave that a hush fell upon the group.
"If you've had your three wishes, it's no good to you now,
then, Morris," said the old man at last. "What do you keep it
for?"
The soldier shook his head. "Fancy, I suppose," he said
slowly. "I did have some idea of selling it, but I don't think I will. It
has caused enough mischief already. Besides, people won't buy. They think it's
a fairy tale, some of them, and those who do think anything of it want to try
it first and pay me afterward."
"If you could have another three wishes," said the old
man, eyeing him keenly, "would you have them?"
"I don't know," said the other. "I don't
know."
He took the paw, and dangling it between his front finger and
thumb, suddenly threw it upon the fire. White, with a slight cry, stooped down
and snatched it off.
"Better let it burn," said the soldier solemnly.
"If you don't want it, Morris," said the old man,
"give it to me."
"I won't," said his friend doggedly. "I threw it on
the fire. If you keep it, don't blame me for what happens. Pitch it on the fire
again, like a sensible man."
The other shook his head and examined his new possession closely.
"How do you do it?" he inquired.
"Hold it up in your right hand and wish aloud," said the
sergeant major, "but I warn you of the consequences."
"Sounds like the Arabian Nights," said Mrs. White, as
she rose and began to set the supper. "Don't you think you might wish for
four pairs of hands for me?"
Her husband drew the talisman from his pocket and then all three
burst into laughter as the sergeant major, with a look of alarm on his face, caught
him by the arm.
"If you must wish," he said gruffly, "wish for
something sensible."
Mr. White dropped it back into his pocket, and placing chairs,
motioned his friend to the table. In the business of supper the talisman was
partly forgotten, and afterward the three sat listening in an enthralled
fashion to a second installment of the soldier's adventures in India.
"If the tale about the monkey's paw is not more truthful than
those he has been telling us," said Herbert, as the door closed behind
their guest, just in time for him to catch the last train, "we shan't make
much out of it."
"Did you give him anything for it, Father?" inquired
Mrs. White, regarding her husband closely.
"A trifle," said he, coloring slightly. "He didn't
want it, but I made him take it. And he pressed me again to throw it
away."
"Likely," said Herbert, with pretended horror.
"Why, we're going to be rich, and famous, and happy. Wish to be an
emperor, Father, to begin with; then you can't be henpecked."
He darted around the table, pursued by the maligned Mrs. White
armed with an antimacassar.
Mr. White took the paw from his pocket and eyed it dubiously.
"I don't know what to wish for, and that's a fact," he said slowly.
"It seems to me I've got all I want."
"If you only cleared the house, you'd be quite happy,
wouldn't you?" said Herbert, with his hand on his shoulder. "Well,
wish for two hundred pounds, then; that'll just do it."
His father, smiling shamefacedly at his own credulity, held up the
talisman, as his son, with a solemn face somewhat marred by a wink at his
mother, sat down at the piano and struck a few impressive chords.
"I wish for two hundred pounds," said the old man
distinctly.
A fine crash from the piano greeted the words, interrupted by a
shuddering cry from the old man. His wife and son ran toward him.
"It moved," he cried, with a glance of disgust at the
object as it lay on the floor. "As I wished, it twisted in my hand like a
snake."
"Well, I don't see the money," said his son, as he
picked it up and placed it on the table, "and I bet I never shall."
"It must have been your fancy, Father," said his wife,
regarding him anxiously.
He shook his head. "Never mind, though; there's no harm done,
but it gave me a shock all the same."
They sat down by the fire again while the two men finished their
pipes. Outside, the wind was higher than ever, and the old man started
nervously at the sound of a door banging upstairs. A silence unusual and
depressing settled upon all three, which lasted until the old couple rose to
retire for the night.
"I expect you'll find the cash tied up in a big bag in the
middle of your bed," said Herbert, as he bade them good night, "and
something horrible squatting up on top of the wardrobe watching you as you
pocket your ill-gotten gains."
In the brightness of the wintry sun next morning as it streamed
over the breakfast table, Herbert laughed at his fears. There was an air of
prosaic wholesomeness about the room which it had lacked on the previous night,
and the dirty, shriveled little paw was pitched on the sideboard with a
carelessness which betokened no great belief in its virtues.
"I suppose all old soldiers are the same," said Mrs.
White. "The idea of our listening to such nonsense! How could wishes be
granted in these days? And if they could, how could two hundred pounds hurt
you, Father?"
"Might drop on his head from the sky," said the
frivolous Herbert.
"Morris said the things happened so naturally," said his
father, "that you might, if you so wished, attribute it to
coincidence."
"Well, don't break into the money before I come back,"
said Herbert, as he rose from the table. "I'm afraid it'll turn you into a
mean, avaricious man, and we shall have to disown you."
His mother laughed, and following him to the door, watched him
down the road, and returning to the breakfast table, was very happy at the
expense of her husband's credulity. All of which did not prevent her from
scurrying to the door at the postman's knock, nor prevent her from referring
somewhat shortly to retired sergeant majors of bibulous habits, when she found
that the post brought a tailor's bill.
"Herbert will have some more of his funny remarks, I expect,
when he comes home," she said, as they sat at dinner.
"I daresay," said Mr. White, pouring himself out some
beer; "but for all that, the thing moved in my hand; that I'll swear
to."
"You thought it did," said the old lady soothingly.
"I say it did," replied the other. "There was no
thought about it; I had just-- What's the matter?"
His wife made no reply. She was watching the mysterious movements
of a man outside, who, peering in an undecided fashion at the house, appeared
to be trying to make up his mind to enter. In mental connection with the two
hundred pounds, she noticed that the stranger was well dressed and wore a silk
hat of glossy newness. Three times he paused at the gate, and then walked on
again. The fourth time he stood with his hand upon it, and then with sudden
resolution flung it open and walked up the path. Mrs. White at the same moment
placed her hands behind her, and hurriedly unfastening the strings of her
apron, put that useful article of apparel beneath the cushion of her chair.
She brought the stranger, who seemed ill at ease, into the room.
He gazed furtively at Mrs. White, and listened in a preoccupied fashion as the
old lady apologized for the appearance of the room, and her husband's coat, a
garment which he usually reserved for the garden. She then waited as patiently
as her sex would permit for him to broach his business, but he was at first
strangely silent.
"I--was asked to call," he said at last, and stooped and
picked a piece of cotton from his trousers. "I come from Maw and
Meggins."
The old lady started. "Is anything the matter?" she
asked breathlessly. "Has anything happened to Herbert? What is it? What is
it?"
Her husband interposed. "There, there, Mother," he said
hastily. "Sit down, and don't jump to conclusions. You've not brought bad
news, I'm sure, sir," and he eyed the other wistfully.
"I'm sorry--" began the visitor.
"Is he hurt?" demanded the mother.
The visitor bowed in assent. "Badly hurt," he said
quietly, "but he is not in any pain."
"Oh, thank God!" said the old woman, clasping her hands.
"Thank God for that! Thank--"
She broke off suddenly as the sinister meaning of the assurance
dawned upon her and she saw the awful confirmation of her fears in the other's
averted face. She caught her breath, and turning to her slower-witted husband,
laid her trembling old hand upon his. There was a long silence.
"He was caught in the machinery," said the visitor at
length, in a low voice.
"Caught in the machinery," repeated Mr. White, in a
dazed fashion, "yes."
He sat staring blankly out at the window, and taking his wife's
hand between his own, pressed it as he had been wont to do in their old courting
days nearly forty years before.
"He was the only one left to us," he said, turning
gently to the visitor. "It is hard."
The other coughed, and rising, walked slowly to the window.
"The firm wished me to convey their sincere sympathy with you in your great
loss," he said, without looking around. "I beg that you will
understand I am only their servant and merely obeying orders."
There was no reply; the old woman's face was white, her eyes
staring, and her breath inaudible; on the husband's face was a look such as his
friend the sergeant might have carried into his first action.
"I was to say that Maw and Meggins disclaim all
responsibility," continued the other. "They admit no liability at
all, but in consideration of your son's services they wish to present you with
a certain sum as compensation."
Mr. White dropped his wife's hand, and rising to his feet, gazed
with a look of horror at his visitor. His dry lips shaped the words, "How
much?"
"Two hundred pounds," was the answer.
Unconscious of his wife's shriek, the old man smiled faintly, put
out his hands like a sightless man, and dropped, a senseless heap, to the
floor.
In the huge new cemetery, some two miles distant, the old people
buried their dead, and came back to a house steeped in shadow and silence. It
was all over so quickly that at first they could hardly realize it, and
remained in a state of expectation, as though of something else to
happen--something else which was to lighten this load, too heavy for old hearts
to bear. But the days passed, and expectation gave place to resignation--the
hopeless resignation of the old, sometimes miscalled apathy. Sometimes they
hardly exchanged a word, for now they had nothing to talk about, and their days
were long to weariness.
It was about a week after that that the old man, waking suddenly
in the night, stretched out his hand and found himself alone. The room was in
darkness, and the sound of subdued weeping came from the window. He raised
himself in bed and listened.
"Come back," he said tenderly. "You will be
cold."
"It is colder for my son," said the old woman, and wept
afresh.
The sound of her sobs died away on his ears. The bed was -warm,
and his eyes heavy with sleep. He dozed fitfully, and then slept until a sudden
cry from his wife awoke him with a start.
"The monkey's paw!" she cried wildly. "The monkey's
paw!"
He started up in alarm. "Where? Where is it? What's the
matter?" She came stumbling across the room toward him. "I want
it," she said quietly. "You've not destroyed it?"
"It's in the parlor, on the bracket," he replied,
marveling. "Why?"
She cried and laughed together, and bending over, kissed his
cheek.
"I only just thought of it," she said hysterically.
"Why didn't I think of it before? Why didn't you think of it?"
"Think of what?" he questioned.
"The other two wishes," she replied rapidly. "We've
only had one."
"Was not that enough?" he demanded fiercely.
"No," she cried triumphantly; "we'll have one more.
Go down and get it quickly, and wish our boy alive again."
The man sat up in bed and flung the bedclothes from his quaking
limbs. "Good God, you are mad!" he cried, aghast.
"Get it," she panted; "get it quickly, and wish--
Oh, my boy, my boy!"
Her husband struck a match and lit the candle. "Get back to
bed," he said unsteadily. "You don't know what you are saying."
"We had the first wish granted," said the old woman
feverishly; "why not the second?"
"A coincidence," stammered the old man.
"Go and get it and wish," cried the old woman, and
dragged him toward the door.
He went down in the darkness, and felt his way to the parlor, and
then to the mantelpiece. The talisman was in its place, and a horrible fear
that the unspoken wish might bring his mutilated son before him ere he could
escape from the room seized upon him, and he caught his breath as he found that
he had lost the direction of the door. His brow cold with sweat, he felt his
way around the table, and groped along the wall until he found himself in the
small passage with the unwholesome thing in his hand.
Even his wife's face seemed changed as he entered the room. It was
white and expectant, and to his fears seemed to have an unnatural look upon it.
He was afraid of her.
"Wish!" she cried, in a strong voice.
"It is foolish and wicked," he faltered.
"Wish!" repeated his wife.
He raised his hand. "I wish my son alive again."
The talisman fell to the floor, and he regarded it shudderingly.
Then he sank trembling into a chair as the old woman, with burning eyes, walked
to the window and raised the blind.
He sat until he was chilled with the cold, glancing occasionally
at the figure of the old woman peering through the window. The candle end,
which had burned below the rim of the china candlestick, was throwing pulsating
shadows on the ceiling and walls, until, with a flicker larger than the rest,
it expired. The old man, with an unspeakable sense of relief at the failure of
the talisman, crept back to his bed, and a minute or two afterward the old
woman came silently and apathetically beside him.
Neither spoke, but both lay silently listening to the ticking of
the clock. A stair creaked, and a squeaky mouse scurried noisily through the
wall. The darkness was oppressive, and after lying for some time screwing up
his courage, the husband took the box of matches, and striking one, went downstairs
for a candle.
At the foot of the stairs the match went out, and he paused to
strike another, and at the same moment a knock, so quiet and stealthy as to be
scarcely audible, sounded on the front door.
The matches fell from his hand. He stood motionless, his breath
suspended until the knock was repeated. Then he turned and fled swiftly back to
his room, and closed the door behind him. A third knock sounded through the
house.
"What's that?" cried the old woman, starting up.
"A rat," said the old man, in shaking tones, "a
rat. It passed me on the stairs."
His wife sat up in bed listening. A loud knock resounded through
the house.
"It's Herbert!" she screamed. "It's Herbert!"
She ran to the door, but her husband was before her, and catching
her by the arm, held her tightly.
"What are you going to do?" he whispered hoarsely.
"It's my boy; it's Herbert!" she cried, struggling
mechanically. "I forgot it was two miles away. What are you holding me
for? Let go. I must open the door."
"For God's sake don't let it in," cried the old man,
trembling.
"You're afraid of your own son," she cried, struggling.
"Let me go. I'm coming, Herbert; I'm coming."
There was another knock, and another. The old woman with a sudden
wrench broke free and ran from the room. Her husband followed to the landing,
and called after her appealingly as she hurried downstairs. He heard the chain
rattle back and the bottom bolt drawn slowly and stiffly from the socket. Then
the old woman's voice, strained and panting.
"The bolt," she cried loudly. "Come down. I can't
reach it."
But her husband was on his hands and knees groping wildly on the
floor in search of the paw. If he could only find it before the thing outside
got in. A perfect fusillade of knocks reverberated through the house, and he
heard the scraping of a chair as his wife put it down in the passage against
the door. He heard the creaking of the bolt as it came slowly back, and at the
same moment, he found the monkey's paw, and frantically breathed his third and
last wish.
The knocking ceased suddenly, although the echoes of it were still
in the house. He heard the chair drawn back and the door opened. A cold wind
rushed up the staircase, and a long, loud wail of disappointment and misery
from his wife gave him courage to run down to her side, and then to the gate
beyond. The streetlamp flickering opposite shone on a quiet and deserted road.
nama:asmawati
ReplyDeletenpm; 1223073
This story is very interesting because it is suitable for learning experience.